dr.regis was our lecturer again, and he talked about emancipation day and race/ethnicity. one of the reasons we're here in trinidad is to experience emancipation day, one of the few (if not only) events celebrating the freeing of the slaves in the world. dr. regis explained that the reason this day exists in trinidad/tobago and not anywhere else is because trinidad/tobago wasn't the usual slave society. 1, they had the fewer years of slavery because the island hadn't been really settled as early as other places were (remember, there was no gold here so, the settlement was slow). 2, because britain kept sending captured slave ships to trinidad/tobago and because of the american war of 1812 blacks who came to settle here, trinidad/tobago had a large free black population. 3, trinidad was kind of the "wild west" of its time... people would go there to let their hair down, and it was a really lawless place. because of all of these points, the blacks who lived here didn't have their black consciousness beat out of them and were able to retain a sense of african heritage. so, every august 1, emancipation day, the day slavery was abolished in the caribbean british islands, is celebrated. however, dr. regis stressed that emancipation is not physical... it's emancipation of the mind. and as far as he's concerned, the blacks of trinidad/tobago (and around the world for that matter) have not yet been freed.
"what are we celebrating?"he explained that blacks in trinidad/tobago are discriminated against ("a subtle discrimination") and are marginalized economically and socially, which was really interesting considering this is the same guy who was talking about how great of a mixture it is here. he explained that the space is shared but the coming together doesn't necessarily happen. a lot, if not all, of the things he talked about sounded exactly like america. black living conditions and schools are generally worse... and it's created a "culture of poverty" where you don't think about 20 years ahead. you're hopeless.. and it's all about instant gratification.
"we might claim to be poor... but somewhere you thought 'i want to be here or there in 2020'... in the culture of poverty, there is no 2020."everyone is waiting for a messiah... and guess where they are looking to? they're looking towards the united states because we... are known for messiahs (mlk, malcom x...).
"the west indies look up to blacks in america. you have a lot more that we do not have. and we wonder why you don't do more."i basically heard this exact same thing in south africa. i'm starting to think that black americans are like ... role models for blacks in the diaspora.. but there's this underlying idea that we're lazy, gangster/sexualized (from rap music/videos) or something... no one ever seems to realize that we're going through the same things in the U.S. that they are in their own countries.
so.. even though there's this mixture of people on the island... and there's brown everywhere, there are these unconscious boundaries. so, dr. regis has beef, and rightfully so, with emancipation day.
it's a beautiful spectacle, but what happens the day after?after the lecture, i decided i needed to go to the library before it started storming. i told shannon that i was leaving and would be back around/before 4:30pm so we could get our group presentation together. just when i was about 3/4s the way through, the rain came.. and it came hard. i got really dripping wet, but luckily the library wasn't cold. now, this library has so many ridiculous rules. you can't bring a book-bag inside and because we aren't really students here, you can't check out a book. to get pages copied and printed from a book, you have to buy a copying card for 20 TT$ and then pay like .25 TTcents for each page copied. so basically, your best bet is to bring a notebook and a pencil and copy everything down by hand! i tried to find a particular book that dr. charleston thomas told me to look up, but i couldn't find it on the shelves. i think it was in the special collections area, but when i went there, there were so many rules on the door... i was just like "fuck it." i got scared. lol. i didn't want to be in there looking dumb. so, i just went to the very small section about tobago history and basically took all the books. most of the books were written from a eurocentric point-of-view with very little information about the lives of the slaves. i got a lot of information from a big manuscript looking book from some committee. most of the stuff i got out of it were written by a j.d. elder, who i later found out was co-founder of the tobago heritage festival. perfect.
after my hand started cramping up, i decided to go grab my first legitimate meal in a while. for the past couple of days, i had only been eating peanut butter on bread or peanut butter on a spoon. i was cool though, which bothers me a little bit. i don't want to get too familiar with poverty, you feel me? i headed to the campus subway, hoping for a deal. i got the foot-long tuna sub (39TT$) with the intention of making it into 2 meals. the worker at the subway was kind of making things difficult for me though. at first, i could understand what she was saying, and i think i'm pretty good with understanding the accent here, but then she would start talking very low and very fast. also, i think she kept my money because she only charged me, on the receipt, 1TT$ and that was for my honey oat bread. anyway, i headed back to the dorm room. upon arrival, i asked shannon if everyone was ready to work on our group presentation... ... ........ apparently they had already decided on an idea. they decided on poems that described each day of our trip.. ....... ...... and, my days were chosen for me as well...... .. ... ... [sarcasm] great [sarcasm].
not that i was surprised that they wouldn't wait an hour or two for me to get back from the library... no, the surprise was in what they chose. poems....? the presentation is supposed to reflect what we had learned. and.. they came up with poems about each day we were there. to me... the idea didn't reflect what we had learned at all. those poems could have been done by anyone who could read our schedule... sure, they had little personal experiences in them, but i thought the assignment was about also reflecting what we had learned. not telling what we had learned but reflecting it. doing poems was just a super lame idea to me. i would have rather done some of the dance moves we had learned and/or song we had learned... and maybe a rapso. or even a skit. there were like so many better things we could have done really.... the poems idea seemed to be like two steps above a power point presentation on the lame scale. we had seen some of the presentations from the past... and those were lame. and, our social coordinators and professors had told us about some of the best ones. we had all bragged that we were gonna do such a great job.. so i still have no idea where that promising foundation turned into doing poems. not even spoken word, which has rhythm... or something with some kind of movement... just poems. and each person did their own days separately... so, we didn't even work on it as a group. but, i didn't even complain... they seemed set on it... poems were written out already... so i just went with it, understanding that this is precisely why i hate group projects.. because other people get to impact my grades. ugh! and, i need all the A's i can get.
i went into my room, and i MURDERED THAT TUNA SUB. i killed it. practically ate it in one bite. i wanted to eat the rest, but i reluctantly put it in the refrigerator for the next day. while i was sitting there trying to figure out how to make up 3 poems that weren't corny, treena knocked on the door and gave me the cellular phone. it was dr. turley; she was having problems connecting to the internet and wanted me to help her. i tried to talk her through it over the phone, but that wasn't really working out. so, i told her i'd come to her place and fix it. it turns out, she wasn't at her apartment at all. she was actually on campus at dr.talley's trinidadian memorial service she was having for her husband. i hadn't even heard about it, but apparently, not only should i have known about it, i was expected to be there too. but, turley didn't know what time the event was going to start. so, just in case, i tossed a dress and black high heels in my bag and headed to campus to find dr. turley. the event was going to take place in some lounge that practically no one knew about. dr. turley was there and had no idea where she was, so i had to ask like 8 or 9 people where to go. i would walk a couple of feet, and then ask the next person who walked passed me. they gave me conflicting information... and/or told me to "ask dat person ova dere." finally, i found someone who "thought" it was around the corner. i followed a group of people, and luckily they walked right past the place.
when i got there, i wasn't able to get turley's laptop connected to the internet (she wanted to get skype working so people who weren't there could still be a part of the memorial service), but she told me that the service would begin in thirty minutes. i was so glad i brought a change of clothes! after i changed in a random room nearby, i sat down with turley and the other guests that were there and had a really great time. they were all interesting older women... they reminded me of how i want to be when i get older... really saucy (bold, intelligent, and foxy). they were all really sweet to me too, and i enjoyed their company. it was so refreshing.
i never got the chance to meet the late dr. talley, but, as i said before on my tumblr, this is the first time in my life... that someone has died... and i felt like i missed out. when people talk about him, they just say the most amazing things. and, you can tell by the things he did during his life that he was the real deal. just like his other memorial in louisville, there was great music, food, and drinks. and i indulged because from everything people have said of dr. talley, that's what he would have wanted me to do.
i was first in the food line because all the ladies at the table were like "you're a student, we know you're hungry!" lol. the lady who was serving gave me so much food too. i wish i had known about the memorial service, because i wouldn't have bought that subway earlier. i had chicken, ?calaloo?, ?some kinda chick peas?... ?some kinda starchy potato-like stuff?.. and a salad. my technique for eating in trinidad is JUST EAT IT! lol. because, all the food is so delicious. people usually come back around and tell me what it is i'm eating, but by the the time they do that, i've already eaten it and decided it's delicious... so, i kind of 1/2 pay attention and later forget what they said. lol. my "eat now, question later" approach has gotten me in trouble a few times though because sometimes things are really spicy and before i can be warned, it's already burning my mouth up."dayo bejide trio" is the group that performed, and they were awesome. i even got to chat with a couple of the group members after the service, and they were really nice. to be perfectly honest, i had had enough wine to be feeling MIGHTY good.... not intoxicated...but highly relaxed by the end of the service. i decided to take down my braids...(i borrowed a pair of scissors from a random trini girl in our dorm) and i was in the perfect mood to write those corny little poems. i "practiced" the presentation with the rest of the group, and then stayed up until 3am taking down my hair and watching "40 year old virgin" and "juno."
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